UMadeAllThoseDecisionsSince2017ForYourOwnHappiness-Selfishly-OK-SoWhyAreYouSad-SomethingToThinkAbout

and im not saying idc if ure sad, but its something to think about.

bc i made these decisions to want to talk to u bc it made me happy but im really not in the pursuit of happiness anymore like idc thats all bullsht, im in the pursuit of being a useful person. if i have to interview someone ever, a useful person would be as professional as possible, thats it.

im going to say this, right here, bc its consistent with the repos title. and u need to understand this for urself. if someone ure interested in, is going this far, to fight for u, https://shutter.vibecodeistan.com/p/217 and etc etc. and ure in another relationship the entire time, ure a very, very immature person. myopic, self-centered/selfish person either u dunno what u want or u know exactly what it is that u want, in either case, its not me ENTIRELY, right? so at best, we would be, very, very, good, the bestest-friends ever bc like i said, either u dunno what u want, and/or u know exactly what u want, and u have exactly what that is, with who u are with.

like here is another example. seriously pay attention to this, im literally being serious. u can be the greatest cheesecake ever, but if someone wants banana pudding, what are they going to do? take some cheesecake, and throw out the rest of the slice, it's not what they want. that's true with jobs too, right? i was all that, igem/debashish's lab which had two sequencers etc. etc. and i took up to linear algebra, and those penn ibi losers didnt know what to do with me, didnt care about any of that, they didnt put me on those pennai projects (on purpose! my two co-workers said they asked for me to be on their slack/on those pennai projs and they declined (either it was randy olsen or jason himself)). they had three ppl working on those pennai projects THAT NEVER even took linear algebra. they wanted a m.s. in animal science who ate deer road kill, that was their ride or die. that was their "taste" & i didnt know that was ever going to happen, bc i thought, oh it's penn, i should be what they want, i should flourish here, but it wasnt and i did not.

but i flourished during igem and the two other labs i was at, at rutgers. they loved me for all of that at sampled, i was very important to them to all of my managers for everything i am -- they wanted cheesecake, and i was the best cheesecake. they trusted me with those very high-stakes projects bc they knew i could do it & alone without any help (and before chatgpt/claude). debashish wanted cheesecake, and i was the best cheesecake (as an undergrad, i learned R/Bioconductor, then i taught his post-docs R/Bioconductor).

here ill give u another example. jim stapleton (https://chenected.aiche.org/2018/09/james-stapleton-university-oregon-future-chemical-engineering) who was one of my igem advisors, at the conference we were at (so this is in 2011) while we were in our hotel room working on our presentation, my software PM asked him, bc i think it was bc there was a football stadium nearby, so anyway, she asked him, "do u like college football or the NFL" and he said something like "NFL -- i like my football to be very clean, very professional etc." and i remember thinking about this bc i didnt appreciate what he said until recently, esp when i was at MSK, i was like wtf was i doing at penn, this is a great place to work, everyone here is at the top of their game. i dont want immature/immaturity, i dont want immaturity in any form, i want the NFL. so we would be the bestest-best friends, but anything more than that, id call u a btch in public and i dont want that. REALLY i really mean that. ahh but as bestest-best friends, i can sit down and talk to u at a diner for like 6 hrs and that's fun, nobody gets hurt.

anyway im putting up the 20 questions, i have to answer 20 questions before i log into distill bc its that distracting. we'll talk on weekends.